In the past few months, I have been wondering where he’d gone because he is usually very active on the net. I was a little bit afraid that the darkness would consume him as I feel that it was in there from our exchange of thoughts, but because I never knew him at personal level, I never asked the question. He left me a message before saying he will respond to my latest comment, but never did.

Weeks passed, and today I received a DM from his twitter account – @VinaMist notified me that Chris (lethe’s real name) had passed away a month ago. I was just at Taste Of Melbourne, in rapture after savouring the myriad of beautiful food and wine in that place. To receive news of death at such a joyous occasion is a new experience to me.

To be honest I feel for him, not many people connects to others with that amount of sincerity. He connects to people through his work – I feel that had he not died, he would have contributed greatly to the world of literature. He invited me once to converse over Skype, I wished I had taken that opportunity while it was still knocking on my door. But such is life, I guess.

I don’t think that the news ruined the experience. I accept that this is the nature of things, that for every beginning there is an end. At the back of my mind I wanted to know, how did he passed away? But for me who is on the other side of the world, this would be a no-question. This would be like asking whether the Dailai Lama owned  a pair of jeans or not.

For those who have no means to find out, it is a no-question. I will never know. And so I let go of the question and appreciate what little is left.

Lethe, this will be my final poetry for you. May you rest in peace, my friend.

The Day Turned

With eyes open I stepped outside;
on the pond was the moon,
reflected.

Darkness falls, the day is gone
and the sun’s warmth in my heart,
remembered.

The middle way is not found in the fanatics
It is also not found in the ignorant and non-believers.

The middle way is not for the lazy
It is also not found in overwork.

The middle way is more subtle
than the hint of sweetness in a strong black coffee.

It is unimaginably difficult to perceive.
yet for those who have seen it, it can’t not be seen again.

As Buddha say in the lotus Sutra
“The Door to enlightenment is difficult to perceive and impossible to attain”

It is only with constant practice, and determined effort
can one understand one’s true nature

And it is only through understanding of the one true nature
that the universe is subdued.

When this done,
The way that is no way
will be in full play.

this is a very good way of capturing notes on the go. This is done through an application called MaStory. Seriously, is there anything this phone can’t do!?

Btw I am gathering notes on n900 configuration. It will be one hell of a guide once it’s done.

Wept the Autumn Wind
and all, hundred-thousand
cherry blossom petals,
rains upon the ground.

In awe and admiration,
I observe this change of season.
Oh, heavenly orchestration!
How did you become?

My own self dies
as I realize
the “I”
that was never there

Beautiful is
the heart that appreciates,
the eye that sees
the world as is.

-

written in response to one by Lethe Bashar called ‘The theatre is self-contained‘. Note: tree image is found through google, I didn’t take this picture.

Alexander died in the 114th Olympiad, in the archonship of Genesias at Athens. He lived, as Aristobulus tells us, thirty-two years and eight months, and reigned twelve years and eight months. He had great personal beauty, invincible power of endurance, and a keen intellect;he was brave and adventurous, strict in the observance of his religious duties, and hungry for fame.

Most temperate in the pleasures of the body, his passion was for glory only, and in that he was insatiable. He had an uncanny instinct for the right course in a difficult and complex situation, and was most happy in his deductions from observed facts.

In arming and equipping troops and in his military dispositions he was always masterly. Noble indeed was his power of inspiring his men, of filling them with confidence, and, in the moment of danger, of sweeping away their fear by the spectacle of his own fearlessness.

When risks had to be taken, he took them with the utmost boldness, and his ability to seize the moment for a swift blow, before his enemy had any suspicion of what was coming, was beyond praise. No cheat or liar ever caught him off his guard, and both his word and his bond were inviolable.

…

There are many treacherous men in Alexander’s age, and no one could control what other people write about you when you die. I believe this reflection from Arrian upon Alexander’s character to be genuine.

I’m not saying that Alexander is the ultimate man, he is far from it. He does many things that he shouldn’t have done, as most men do. However, we should learn from great men and follow their example where it is appropriate and right to do so.

This little piece of text strike me so much as an example of how a man with integrity and character should carry his life – that I decided to post it here. I hope you find that little piece of Arrian as inspiring and motivating as I did.

Now it’s time for a little jog

Every entity in this world will go through this cycle of living and dying. Nothing shall escape it.

This applies to the most obvious entity of all, our own self. However this also applies to other concept in life. Take for example, a computer system.

A computer system is often the result of a software project. There is the moment where an idea is being formulated, a prototype is built to pitch the project, budget acquired, team formulated and grown, and finally, the project took off (birth). Over time, the system is crafted, again and again it is perfected, broken, fixed, patched, deployed. installed, broken again, fixed again, and so on (aging).

However, as software system changes hand from one team to another, fixes and enhancement done to it may or may not be in accordance with the original structure conceived by its creators. This will eventually result in various internal complication and inconsistencies. Sometimes it is not the software that age, but the hardware. Disks failing, cables aging, memory corruption, dead power supply, and so on. Indeed, nothing last forever! (sickness).

Finally, at some point, all software system will be retired. It may became obsolete, replaced by a newer system, or simply, broke down (death). On that fateful day, management, end-users, or whoever it is that work closely with the system will eventually look back and reflect upon the value it has contributed to the organization or end users. Even future systems implemented will be measured, directly or indirectly, against its older counterparts.

Therefore for those of you who works in the realm of computing, do keep in mind this principle. Take it to your heart that nothing in this world is permanent.

In doing so, when crafting and scoping a system, it is important that we ask ourself (and the client) – what is the intended lifecycle of this project or software system? how will it be supported and maintained? who will look after the system when your team is gone?

Remember that a software system is an entity as much as you are. How you write each of your system reflects your view and life-state in general. And verily so, you can infer the character of a programmer from a piece of code that he has written. From the various decision points he made which is visible in the way the system is structured, organized, partitioned and optimized.

Have that system lived a life worth living?

Well, have you?

Indeed it is true that truth emerges and lies stripped bare when one reflects upon Death. When the system has reached the end of its live, and your name written as craftsman of that system in the various source code and documentations that surrounds the system, how would you like to be perceived?

So if there is one credo for a programmer to follow, this would be it:

Live a life worth living – Craft a system worth crafting.
The two goes hand in hand.

Every day, do find some time
to stop and think:

Is it OK – to live on like this?

If so,
keep on going
but never stop questioning.

If not -
find the courage,
and seek out the Way!

Considering,
the world that is now on fire.

I pray that you find
the path that you seek,
and

live a life,
worth living.

… Buddhism.

Is it a religion? is it a way of life? is it a spiritual point of reference, a life-philosophy? is it a mystic cult?

To me, to be a Buddhist is to walk the Noble Path. Simply because those who walked on this path will end up living a noble life.

Mind you, a noble life does not necessarily means a life that is free from discomfort – nor does it guarantee excessive and abundant wealth. It is simply a live that is filled with courage, strength, compassion, appreciation, fulfilment, contentment, happiness, and many, many , many other positive values that can not be listed here in full, simply because there are so many.

How wonderful it is to live like that. If everyone walks this path, then SURELY the world will be a much better place?

Indeed it will be. But sadly for us, it is very difficult to find this path, let alone to walk it. Despite all of the treasures of life that can be found along the path – one could be lead to it, offered to walk it, and still not have the desire to go through it .

So really, what compels an individual to walk this path?

Hm…

The Noble Path is really  no different from the path one follows when studying a form of art. It could be the art of painting, the art of war, the performing art, the art of combat, the art of team building, and so on. Any path where deliberate practice is required for continuous improvement is similar in concept to the noble path. But it is not the noble path.

So what is it? In my opinion, the Noble Path is the path of enlightenment – the deliberate study to be better at the art of living. Through it you can unlock potentials that will be useful in any other path you walk on. This is because the Noble Path is a quest for universal truth and wisdom. Universal truth and wisdom applies to everything. Otherwise, they won’t be universal.

Pretty cool, isn’t it? So coming back to the Noble Path question – how does one walks this path exactly?

Well, Buddhism is one obvious way. But I don’t think it is the only way.

Walking the noble path is perhaps similar to climbing up a mountain to see the sunrise from the very summit of that mountain. And from there many other ways that leads to the summit can be clearly seen – the big picture can be perceived as clear as day, not to mention the warm and fuzzy feeling attained, what a  bonus indeed.

There are many routes to reach the summit: Some are hard, some are easy. Some goes through the bushes and the natural landscape, some goes through well-traversed road, some focuses on speed, some offers flexibility but less speed, and so on.

From this multitude of ways, which one is right for you? The answer lies in your own heart. Whatever it is that you feel is right for you, is right for you. This is because we are all different. Some of us like adventure. Some of us like learning. Some of us like to switch between the two depending on the mood, and so on. You must find what is right for you.

To enforce what you think is right upon others is to be ignorant. I like spicy, you may not like spicy food. We all love good food and we go about to find it in our own way, at our own pace. So take it easy.

However, one does not climb a mountain unless one cultivates the spirit of adventure and the desire to climb the mountain in the first place. So despite all of this awesome talk, we still haven’t solved the most important question: coming back to the Noble Path question – what compels an individual to walk this path and reap the awesome reward of .. well, an awesome life?

Actually, I think it all depends on the individual. A lot of people seek the Noble Path after they have encountered many, many sufferings. I know a lot of Buddhist in their 40s or 50s, even 60s who have only discovered this path. That is because, when they were young, they live in a state of mind that discourage them from seeking this path (it’s “uncool”). Only when they have opened their heart and mind, did they welcome this idea of traversing the path. And then they try it. And then they got hooked

Some are born into this path. I, for one, was born into a Buddhist family – and yet learning about the path, talking about the path is different from walking it. uttering the lyrics from a song and following the melody is not the same as singing the song.

I do not truly walk this path until a few years back – Similar to my fellow Buddhist friends, I only start to walk this path when my heart and mind is open to it – when I welcome the idea of trying this out.

But a theme can be seen here -  basically it comes down to this thing called the ‘Seeking Spirit’: The spirit of a human being who longs to transcend their suffering. To be more than they are, to be a part of something much, much greater than themselves.

This spirit is universal, it is within us all. When you have heard the calling, it is impossible to ignore it. And you will seek, and continue to search for this path, until you have found it.

Whether that be from the study of literature, poetry, zen meditation, music; whether that be from living in isolation, or in interaction with the social community; whether that be caused from curiosity, or fear of failure, pursuit of success, or in search of a cure – you will only find the path when your heart searches for it.

Do you have the seeking heart?

I did the above sketch around September last year on exactly this topic.

We adjust our character in accordance to our audience, so that it is easier for the target audience to accept us.  However, this pose an interesting dilemma: How far to alter our own image to fit the audience vs how much identity to retain?

Especially on the internet, any person can craft an online ‘mask’ that is totally different from his/her true identify. Also In real life, we mingle with various groups of people. People in the workplace, strangers in the streets, and so on.  I’ve discussed this phenomena once with my fellow buddhist friends a few months ago – we finaly agreed that this ‘mask’ is actually a form of hypocrisy.

Definition – Hypocrisy:
# insincerity by virtue of pretending to have qualities or beliefs that you do not really have

Hypocrisy is inherently based on the act of lying to others and oneself.

The mask we put is what the audience see – those without the perceiving eye will see only the mask, and will perceive the mask as ourselves. It is an act – we want the audience to think that the mask is the real deal, and we have to act the mask out to make it come alive.

The opposite of hypocrisy is self-respect. A person with absolute self-respect will not be capable of lying to oneself. “Why should we be a different individual other than our own self?” This is what it means to live as a person of absolute integrity.

But of course, we all know how difficult this is – And yet we also know how liberating this must be, to have NO Mask to wear – no make-up nor persona to maintain, to just be you through and through in all circumstances, with all audience.

The first question is this: How far to alter our own image to fit the audience vs how much individuality to retain?

Unfortunately, the mask does not come for free. It come with a price. It took a lot of energy to maintain the appearance to a mask, because each mask needs a certain level of acting to make it come live. And the mask – based on hypocrisy – will at some level present inconsistencies with our own character

If there are zero inconsistencies, then the mask will be an exact replica of our own self, in which case there is no mask needed!

This begs yet another the question: What is the price of maintaining all that mask?

The more insecure a person is, the more layers of mask that person will wear. The more audience/group the person interacts with, the more variety each mask will have. The purpose of the mask is to hide the self. But only if there is a self to hide. Remember that the longer the mask is worn, the more it will chip away your genuine self.

In today’s society, I would say it is IMPOSSIBLE for a person to not have a mask, unless he/she embarks on deliberate practice to attain that character of absolute integrity. I consider it to be one of the key aspect of attaining enlightenment (from a buddhist perspective).

Buddhas in the past, present, and in the future never appear as one persona for one audience and then another persona for another audience. He remains a buddha, through and through, in face of adversity, calamity, as well as in joyous occasion.

This quality of absolute integrity and purity is succinctly expressed in a poem I stumbled upon many many months ago (from this page) by the Zen monk DOGEN.

Enlightenment is like the moon reflected on the water.
The moon does not get wet, nor is the water broken.

Although its light is wide and great,
The moon is reflected even in a puddle an inch wide.

The whole moon and the entire sky
Are reflected in one dewdrop on the grass.

- Dogen

And so, we arrive at the final question to ponder: in Dogen’s poem – and do think about this closely – what quality is possessed by the one tiny dewdrop that enables it to reflect the majestic beauty of ‘the whole moon and the entire sky’ ??

In the most joyous occasion
He is to be seen.

Like a fisherman,
who is found amongst
a school of fish in the sea

He walks
among those who are blind,
enticed by joy and beauty.

O seeker of eternal happiness -

Do not waste your life walking
the round road of pain and suffering!

Steam rose,
impurities evaporates;
I leave it be.

As time goes on,
love, experience, and live
enters the pot.

I let it simmer.

Finally it boils down,
and the essence
is left behind:

A single drop of reflection
upon the world
that is.